The Broken Blade

When I woke up I was alone.... I searched for my shadow. It was not there....Then I suddenly realized that I was in the shadowless land of the Elven Kingdom. This was one of the numerous quirks of the shadowless land. Here I was, Majestic, the vampire slayeress, in the Elven Kingdom waiting for the greatest vampire ever, Draco. I suddenly remembered what it was that woke me up. It was that tried and tested female intuition pricking. I knew for sure that there was an enemy lurking nearby. It was the unbearable stench of thousands of rotten eggs and H₂S that woke me up. Instantly I realized that this was going to be one great fight.

I cautiously stood up and got out of my room.

CRRREEEEEAAAAAAAAAKKKK........

The door hinges made an abominable noise.. “ I’m dead,” I thought with consternation. Whoever was there lurking in the shadows knew that I was up and among the living. He would be aware of each and every movement of mine. In a profession where stealth and secrecy was considered more important than skill, I knew I was doomed.

I moved to the next room, took out my Calvin Klein and daubed it liberally on a scarf and tied it around my nose and mouth.

There, at least that would take care of the creature’s stench.

I walked down carefully and stealthily taking particular care not to make any more noise. I neared the basement where the stench was concentrated the most. As soon as I stepped into the semidarkness, I was forced backward by the thrust of a sword at my chest. I was more than angry at this intrusion on my privacy and sneaky attack.

Who was this vampire who was this arrogant???? – I thought

After a few nano seconds my night vision goggles gave me a clear view of the basement room. What I saw through them stunned me to silence. It was neither the arrogant armadillos not the zooming zamborginis. This was one of the greatest vampires ever, with an ear splitting voice, Reshammiya... Himesh Reshammiya. His canines long and sharp and waiting to sink into my pretty neck. I knew that to defeat him, I would have to use brains and beauty along with my skill and experience.

He started circling me like a born fighter. Both of us were waiting for the other to make the first move. Finally, I got irritated and thrust my sword at him with the speed of lightning. Using a move right out of the Bond movies, Himesh sidestepped me and blocked all my attacks quite easily. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw that my 2 comrades, Layla and Tanisha, were chained at 2 corners of the room. All of a sudden the gravity of the situation hit me..... My very able and skilled friends chained to the pillars. How rude of Himesh to do that!! He must have known that we slayers hate losing our independence more than anything.....even death....

For the first time since I came into this profession as vampire slayer, I felt fear. Fear that Himesh, one of the greatest vampires ever would get the better of me. We parried for a while. One of his thrusts were so vicious that it broke the blade of my sword into two !! The finest sword forged by the elven kings of Daggerknoff was into 2 pieces.......

“ Booooooooo hooooooooo............Sniff Sniff “

I started crying. I couldn’t control my grief. My best sword...... in 2 pieces. My grief was beyond control.....My tears were coming down in torrents. Even the vampire Himesh was stunned. Soon he started to get panicky, because my tears were starting to fill up the room. Being a slayeress, my tears had the property of not causing harm to myself or fellow slayers...... Pretty soon, Himesh was at my feet, begging forgiveness.... Pleading for his life.... Kissing my feet even.....

At that moment I realized that my dog was licking my feet......

YEEEOOOOWWWWWWWWW.......................

Licking my FEEEETTTT.....yuck yuck...

I scrambled up from my bed and realized that my feet didn’t need a wash. Tommy had licked them pretty thoroughly. I was just about to slip back to my slumber and dreams of Himesh Reshammiya begging my forgiveness when the alarm started ringing.

TRRRRIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNGGGGG !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

7 o clock

I got up from my bed and started searching for my books which also doubled up as my pillow. There goes my internal mark.... Writing stuff about Himesh Reshammiya begging me or having dreams or fantasies was not going to help me get a pass for the exams....and without passing, I might as well search for a tent to live in when my parents chuck me out.

SIGH...

Back to the real world and so on to exams !!!!